What Can We Learn from TV Coaches?
There have been several TV shows about therapy in recent years. Coaching though does not seem to have the same allure. One programme that does feature a coach is Billions — a series that focuses on the activities of hedge fund Axe Capital.
Series 1 aired in the UK in March 2016, 3 months before I came to the end of my career as a bond trader. It was good television — the traders, the markets, and the buzz of the hedge fund world. Seven years later, and now trained as a therapist and executive coach, my attention is now drawn to the work of Axe Capital’s performance coach, Wendy Rhoades.
If you haven’t watched the series, Dr Wendy Rhoades is a trained psychiatrist who works at Axe Capital to help employees deal with the stresses of the financial markets.
So how much do her observations resonate with my experiences talking to clients? I have picked out 3 of her quotes to reflect on.
1. “The thought that someone might know you need help, is worse than not getting the help you need”.
Why is it so hard to ask for help?
Showing vulnerability in the financial sector and many other high-pressure environments isn’t the norm. We often feel that we need to portray an image to the world that we have it all figured out. Don’t show weakness, avoid being wrong and be seen as strong and reliable.
Truthfully no one has it all figured out. Coaching high performers has taught me that even the seemingly most successful people benefit from talking about their challenges, what they are tolerating and having someone help them figure out a better way to move forward.
Asking for help isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength.
2. “You’re just listening to the wrong voice”.
We all have different internal voices. The part that wants to do something vs the one that worries what people will think. The one that wants to change something vs the one that is afraid of the risk. Plus of course the inner critic.
Which should you listen to? Begin to understand what motivates these voices — is it fear or a desire for change that can lead us to a more satisfying life. Talking to a coach can help figure out which voices you should pay more attention to.
3. “Sometimes staying too long is a bigger risk than leaving too soon. There’s never the right time to make a big change”.
It will always be possible to find a reason not to change — too difficult, too big a risk, you might fail.
Undoubtedly change is hard — familiarity is comfortable, however unpalatable it might be. But how big are the risks? When you look back on your life, it’s the risks you didn’t take that will be your biggest regrets.
So why not talk them through with a coach and start to figure out what is really holding you back. Change when you want to rather than when you have to.
If you would like to find out more about coaching contact me at phil@philbergman.co.uk or book a free consultation at https://lnkd.in/dXSwpn9p
